Going to school is a normal routine for many, but going back to school to retrieve results of our O Level results? That's a different thing altogether. And I'm so glad I went back to school with my closest and most beloved friends: The Shoethrowers [Zhi Qing, Charlotte, Azira, Sarah, Praise & Nicolette, Samuel]. We lunched on canteen food, indulging in our last school meal before we went around school, wandering aimlessly, talking, laughing, crapping, camwhoring.

Like we always did. And I hope when we meet, we always will.

Then 1400 hours hit the reality time clock, and we were to proceed to the hall. What came soon enough was a whirlpool of chaos and disorder, but in the midst of this perfect storm, almost everyone came out alright.

Tears of joy, tears of pain. Cries of pure bliss, cries of anguish.

In the hall of Orchid Park Secondary School, once again the scene plays itself over. Like so many batches before our own, they've gotten their O Level results, and they've done what we've done. Cried, scream, jumped for joy, happy-danced, ran around, crumbled to the floor in shock and sometimes disbelief, called their loved ones, been in total disbelief... Everything they've done, we did.

It was the day we got back our O Levels... Yesterday, or rather 12 hours ago (I write this at 2.02 am on 12th Jan '10), and the hall was full of excitement and apprehensive, the atmosphere was electric and contagious. We were all ablaze with nervous energy, so afriad but so eager to get our results. The wait was torturous and gruesome, but we waited it out by being entertained by the Principal's speech and stuff.

They presented the National Average first. After some comparisons and such, we moved on to top students. The Sec 5NA went first, with the two top students, then came to the express batch, and they started with the people with 5 distinctions to the one with 7 distinctions.

When they came to the 6 distinctions... I was so shocked, SO SHOCKED to see my name in lights.

6 Distinctions
1. Neo Yu Jia Michelle ... 4A1

Right underneath KOH LIANG JIANG (congrats to him!) who scored 7 distinctions and who is the top student in OPSS, which effectively makes me the second top student in OPSS. You can't imagine the insanity I went through, I was too happy to cry, too shocked to say anything comprehensible. I was in such a state of shock, too stunned to think right.

But I admittedly am not that completely surprised, because Ms Soo was dropping hints to me over lunch that she was "very proud of [me]" and even asked me "how many distinctions [did I expect". So I could tell that I did do well, but I never imagined this well. 3 A1's, 3 A2's and a bleeding C6 that I'm very proud of. I never thought I'd do this well.

AND TO THINK! After the O Levels, we were whining and wailing over how we screwed up so badly! We cried over it, we dreamt about it, we cringed and hyperventilated over it! And look at where we are, look at what we've accomplished, look at what we've done, look at what we got!

This feeling of truimph... it's beautiful. Knowing that I've done well for almost every examination I sat for in OPSS, and the prelims, and now my O Level's... It's an amazing and authetic feeling that is just truly priceless. Just like having great teachers, awesome friends, wonderous tutors who worked miracles on me... My whole sec 4 experience was just... breathtaking. Priceless. Real. Beautiful.

My Maths tutor once told me that we get what we deserve.

I know I deserved this.

And now the question that brews on everyone's mind, they desperately seek to ask themselves and others as well: Poly or JC? If so, which one?

I don't know what my heart is trying to tell me, through this hazy fog that clouds my mind and prevents me from thinking right. I'm so scared of both ways that I can go, I'm so afriad of the future but I'm dying to live it. I don't want to grow up and leave Secondary School, but I already have, and I have to grow up. Now my life truly begins, and people tell me to forget about the past. How can I? The past is what made me the person I am today, and the person I am today will make my future.

Congradulations to everyone who did well. And to those who didn't do so well, it's not the end of the road. It never is.
"You say that I'm the only one. You say that I'm your Number One. Now you're gone and I feel numb. Tell me where did we go wrong. You were my best friend and boyfriend, now it's seems like you're my worst friend. I gotta do soul searching. Without you I'm a whole different person, I ain't acting like I used to. I don't feel loved like I used to. It was your love I was used to... Why do I had to lo-lo-lo-lose your love, your love, your love? Your love is what it was that have me feeling buzzed. You are my true love."

- -8<- - - - WELCOME to the world of the PLASTIC BEACH - - - ->8- -

a DARK beach with a BLACK view ; it was 1:51 AM

"When the paralytic dreams that we all seem to keep. Drive on engines till they weep. With future pixels in factories far away."

"Singing songs that make you slit your wrists,
It isn't that much fun..."

M N. 5th of the April. 17. Singapore. Female. Facebook. Tumblr.

Ex-Chongfu Primary. / Ex-CHAS.
Graduated Orchid Park Secondary:
Ex-Drama. Ex-Debater. Ex-Student Councillor. Ex-1A3-ian. Once-and-forever-2A3-ian. Ex-3A1-ian. Ex-PROUD-4A1-ian.

NGEE ANN FMS MCM [mass comm] T107/T102. RADIOHEATWAVE.COM Radio DJ. STAGE 52.

IN A RELATIONSHIP ♥

FYI, I quote a LOT of lyrics.

NOT emo, just tends to be more depressed than I'd like.
NOT a rocker, but loves to rock out.
NOT so sure i know who i am.
SUFFERS from Dermatillomania
a passionate LOVE for the colour RED
& PROUD TO BE A freak. Are you?

1. Love myself.
2. Self-Acceptance.
3. Eradicate insecurities.
4. Not to care.
5. Work hard in school.
6. Start over.
7. Take it slow.
8. Keep promises.
9. GPA >3.8 [yr 1.2,1.1,2.2,2.1,3.2]
10. To be MISERABLE and HAPPY.


"If it's not enough, try again. And again. Over and over again."

[[ WaNTS && WiSHES ]]

(1) Gorillaz - Plastic Beach
(2) 30STM - This Is War
(3) New Headphones
(4) Those new JEANS
(5) A Teenage Dream

Alex. :)♥ (my bumbling idiot)

HUTTSON My poopoo DOGGIE. ♥♥♥

BANDS :: MY CHEMICAL ROMANCE. Placebo. Marilyn Manson. 30 Seconds to Mars. Avenged Sevenfold. Linkin Park. Gorillaz. The Blackout. The Academy Is... Fall Out Boy. Bullet For My Valentine. Before Their Eyes. Lady Gaga. Just to name a VERY few...

HEROES :: GERARD WAY. TDK Joker. Jared Leto. Brian Molko. Draco Malfoy. 2D. Gerard Way. ♥ XD

Dilemmas.
The conflict.
Inner conflict.
Prejudiced people.
BUGS.

2A3-ians ♥ We Rock. Like Hell.
3/4A1-ians Over speed limit :D
Shoethrowers ♥ FAMILY
Apphia! :D :D :D Hee.
Azira A-zi-zi-ziraaaa! ♥ xD
Elizabeth ♥!
Elva VaVa :D
Farhan
Gavin
Isabelle
Jessica :D :D :D
Joanne ♥ XD
Joel is a legend!
Kenn Ninjaboy :D
Keng Ying CUZZIN! :D
Li Qing :DDD!
Matin! :D So cuute!
Nazry BiTCH!♥
Pearlyn So cute. :D
Rui Shuin Mah Couzin :D
Safwah rocks hardcore! :D ♥
Samuel ... Moo. :D ♥
Sarah BestFriend WALRUS ♥♥♥
Sheereen :DDD She cool yo!
Shi Wei :D:D:D So rad!
Si Ying, Tan rroooccckksss. :]
Si Ying, Yeh :D
Su Min She rocks!
Su Yuan :]

"Well you can hide a lot about yourself,
But honey, what're you gonna do?
And you can sleep in a coffin,
But the past ain't through with you."

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Image: Beyrout

I'm nothing but a beautiful disaster,
Crying tears of blood and joy
Into this black void.
Oblivion;
It's the place to be.
Ephemeral Romance.
Will you come with me?




i want to be

BEAUTIFUL

inside