It's coming round. AGAIN.

The exams have officially started their torment. Well, not really. Just... next Thursday then they'll start laughing. But the feeling of anxiety and worry, oh woe. I keep thinking I'll fail. As in, not getting the grades I want. Which sucks really because I really, seriously want to pass and excel and retain my position in class.

I've reviewed my past Primary School report book. Good Lord. Oh My God. 11 / 40 was my best class position, and that was when I was in Primary 1!!! Then slowly I started falling alot more.

Stark contrast between now and then. And I plan to keep it that way.

Currently: In case you care, don't worry. I'm okay. Trust me.
Examination Days: 27 & 28 Sept, 3, 4, 5, 8, 9, 10, 11 Oct
Salvation ( i.e. Marking Day ): 12 Oct

Seems a long way off. Yet living in a fast-paced world, I'm really slow to realize it's gonna be over.

"Well you can hide a lot about yourself, but honey, what're you gonna do? And you can sleep in a coffin, but the past ain't through with you."

- -8<- - - - WELCOME to the world of the PLASTIC BEACH - - - ->8- -

a DARK beach with a BLACK view ; it was 2:42 PM

"When the paralytic dreams that we all seem to keep. Drive on engines till they weep. With future pixels in factories far away."

I got my report book back! :D

And yes, I am impressed by my results. Which ends in tragedy because I remembered I failed a few of my tests. ( Mainly History Inference and Science Pratical... Ahh! Damned test. ... But I broke two measuring cylinders so... maybe that's why. ) Anyway:

1. English - C5 ( Mother. Not. Impressed. Unhappy. S.O.S.!!! )

2. Chinese - B4 ( Miracle right? Sadly can't say the same for my coming End-Of-Year exam )

3. Maths - A2 ( Aimed for A1, but it's ok, I guess )

4. Science - A1 ( Surprise, surprise. They didn't include Science Practical marks I see )

5. Geography - A1 ( :] )

6. History - A2 ( Failed History Inference, project brought back up marks. THANK YOU SARAH!!! FOR YOUR AWESOME MOVIE!!! All credit goes to her and my teammates. None for me )

7. Literature - A1 ( "Pride of the Class" ... Ms. Tan, I was seriously aiming for a 15 out of that test actually )

8. D&T - A1 ( Not surprised. Loads of 2A3-ians got this mark )

9. Visual Arts - A2 ( ... Which test was this again...? )

7 A's. A big-time record for me. Only hope I can get serious and start studying harder for my EOY exams. But then again, my mom's damn upset over the C5 for English. Damn test. I can't even remember which test we took for that.
_________________

Well, moving on to more inside information about my week:

Detain - confine: deprive of freedom; take into confinement ( searched by Google )

Talking to my school counsellor. Maybe two kinds of people detain others - Hijackers and terrorists. So you're telling me Sec 2 & Sec 3 girls are so... offended and upset enough to detain other girls ( well mainly one girl ) in a class and prevent her from escaping their interrogation??? That's interesting. And this is only Week 1 of Term 4.

Then again, I should hope that never happens again. Bringing parents and scary-glaring-teachers-that-say-they-are-concerned-not-angry and motherly consellors who make you look from the other side of the picture into your situation ONCE. Is FAR, FAR more than enough. And now the poor girl's going through Emo Talk.

My deepest sympathies.

... Ugh... Have to cram and finish art by Monday, along with the rest of the Sec 2 Express population. Ughhhhhhhh.

Ah yes. The Literature play. Ever met a guy who cries on-stage, forgets to do one important major part of the play and yell in-and-out of the microphone? I have. But can't blame him. I don't blame him for forgetting or being uncomfortable. Besides, I've been in those situations. And some of them don't involve judges or stages.

We lost to 2A2 didn't we? ... Ah well. They deserved to win. Every group did. Wait... Is that true or what? We lost to 2A2????

Did we?!?!?!?!?!?!!!!??

We'll leave it till next week to see who's champs.

"A pebble in the water makes a ripple effect, every action in this world will bear a consequence. If you wade around forever you will surely drown, I see what's going down."

- -8<- - - - WELCOME to the world of the PLASTIC BEACH - - - ->8- -

a DARK beach with a BLACK view ; it was 7:02 PM

"When the paralytic dreams that we all seem to keep. Drive on engines till they weep. With future pixels in factories far away."

I don't want to have any more heartbreaks.

I don't want to watch him any more.

I don't want to glance at his back when he walks away and wish.

I don't want to get to know him more.

I don't want to smile at him any more.

I don't want to suffer liking him.

I don't want him to dislike, to hate me.

I don't want him to know my like for him.

I don't want to like him any more.

So no more. No more gazing. No more wishing. No more dreamy smiles. No more glancing. No more. I can't handle the guilt of liking someone. I can't handle this sad fact of being infatuated with someone. I can't take it. So no more Z. No more "Eye-Candy". No more Him.

This may be something I may regret later on. But it'll pass. After all, are we not moving on till we die?

"Don’t be afraid to get down. Say I don’t wanna be in love, I don’t wanna be in love."

- -8<- - - - WELCOME to the world of the PLASTIC BEACH - - - ->8- -

a DARK beach with a BLACK view ; it was 2:24 PM

"When the paralytic dreams that we all seem to keep. Drive on engines till they weep. With future pixels in factories far away."

Y'know what I love about holidays?

The fact that you can sleep in, sleep late. Screw homework and do your own thing, like going out to watch a movie with your friends or even having good, old-fashioned family time. Or in my case: You can go out and meet your Primary school friend and her friends, spend money over your budget, laugh over crazy jokes, reach home late ( my case: 7pm, pathetic right? )

So it started out with my simple want of having more band tees ( BAND TEES not PANTEES xD ). My friend, Alnette called me, arranged time, met up today. Yeah. But before we get to the real dirt, I was waiting for Alnette but I had time to kill so I decided to head up to Popular at Northpoint before I headed over to Station. Guess who I saw along the way towards the escalator.

There, in between walking near the money changer was him. Z. Z. Z. And his friend or brother or I-don't-know-whoever-that-guy-was but whatever, I saw Z.!!! ... You rarely see the guy you like whenever you're walking around aimlessly. Coincidence and fate really have to make themselves look alot more obvious now.
And he looked so cute!! And I'm serious, I really didn't plan to see him at NP at... 12+ noontime? Hm. I dunno whether he noticed me, I think he did. But whatever, I avoided him. Didn't dare look at him when I had to pass by him the second time.

Moving on! I met up with Alnette and her friend, Joo Yu. Headed over to City Hall, where the "Emo People" lurked at one shopping center. Dude, I have never seen a place with more Emo stuff ever. Even more than Johore Bahru. THEY SOLD BAND TEES AND SKINNIES!!! Not to mention the silver studded belts... God, and I ran all the way to Malaysia to buy my Emo belt when it's so readily available in my own country!?!?
} -- What's wrong with me? -- {

Bought two black Band Tees with Avenged Sevenfold and My Chemical Romance. Two black tees that cost 28 bucks!! X____x Holee sheet. I didn't even bring that much amount in CASH. Plus, I might get the skinny black jeans. They make people look desperately thin!! Ah ha, the things I say to convince myself. Sigh...

Then moving on to Bugis. Street. I never knew that Bugis Street had a Gothic-like shop. God damn... I was so inspired I wanted to buy one of those Gothic Lolita outfits, dress up, doll up, put on make-up and go cosplay. Gahhh, that's so stoopid even for me to say. XD Bought myself another Gothic-like tee.

It had "Fuck! Fuck!" at the back but the "F" looked like a cursive "B" so it's "Buck! Buck!". I dunno, my mom wasn't too happy when I showed it to her. The quote on the backprint ( "Society Denies my Personality" ) says alot. So naturally I loved it. Cost 32.90. It's even cheaper than the strait-jacket-like shirt I bought at Far East Plaza.

... There goes my budget. Then came Hilary, Alnette's "always-late, fake-ang-moh" friend. I swear if Alnette didn't point out she wasn't ang moh, I would have believed she was. The always-late part... Well. I've never met a person who's 3 / 4 hours late for an outing. Have you?

More browsing. No shopping. Cause we're broke. Then finally I had to go home. Yeee-yeahhhh... That's it. It was fun, I must admit. It was so freaking fun.

So when you guys got more money, wanna go shopping again? xD Ahaha, no... Maybe not.

"Our hearts a bloodstained egg, we didn't handle with care. It's broken and bleeding. And we could never repair."

- -8<- - - - WELCOME to the world of the PLASTIC BEACH - - - ->8- -

a DARK beach with a BLACK view ; it was 11:02 PM

"When the paralytic dreams that we all seem to keep. Drive on engines till they weep. With future pixels in factories far away."

"Singing songs that make you slit your wrists,
It isn't that much fun..."

M N. 5th of the April. 17. Singapore. Female. Facebook. Tumblr.

Ex-Chongfu Primary. / Ex-CHAS.
Graduated Orchid Park Secondary:
Ex-Drama. Ex-Debater. Ex-Student Councillor. Ex-1A3-ian. Once-and-forever-2A3-ian. Ex-3A1-ian. Ex-PROUD-4A1-ian.

NGEE ANN FMS MCM [mass comm] T107/T102. RADIOHEATWAVE.COM Radio DJ. STAGE 52.

IN A RELATIONSHIP ♥

FYI, I quote a LOT of lyrics.

NOT emo, just tends to be more depressed than I'd like.
NOT a rocker, but loves to rock out.
NOT so sure i know who i am.
SUFFERS from Dermatillomania
a passionate LOVE for the colour RED
& PROUD TO BE A freak. Are you?

1. Love myself.
2. Self-Acceptance.
3. Eradicate insecurities.
4. Not to care.
5. Work hard in school.
6. Start over.
7. Take it slow.
8. Keep promises.
9. GPA >3.8 [yr 1.2,1.1,2.2,2.1,3.2]
10. To be MISERABLE and HAPPY.


"If it's not enough, try again. And again. Over and over again."

[[ WaNTS && WiSHES ]]

(1) Gorillaz - Plastic Beach
(2) 30STM - This Is War
(3) New Headphones
(4) Those new JEANS
(5) A Teenage Dream

Alex. :)♥ (my bumbling idiot)

HUTTSON My poopoo DOGGIE. ♥♥♥

BANDS :: MY CHEMICAL ROMANCE. Placebo. Marilyn Manson. 30 Seconds to Mars. Avenged Sevenfold. Linkin Park. Gorillaz. The Blackout. The Academy Is... Fall Out Boy. Bullet For My Valentine. Before Their Eyes. Lady Gaga. Just to name a VERY few...

HEROES :: GERARD WAY. TDK Joker. Jared Leto. Brian Molko. Draco Malfoy. 2D. Gerard Way. ♥ XD

Dilemmas.
The conflict.
Inner conflict.
Prejudiced people.
BUGS.

2A3-ians ♥ We Rock. Like Hell.
3/4A1-ians Over speed limit :D
Shoethrowers ♥ FAMILY
Apphia! :D :D :D Hee.
Azira A-zi-zi-ziraaaa! ♥ xD
Elizabeth ♥!
Elva VaVa :D
Farhan
Gavin
Isabelle
Jessica :D :D :D
Joanne ♥ XD
Joel is a legend!
Kenn Ninjaboy :D
Keng Ying CUZZIN! :D
Li Qing :DDD!
Matin! :D So cuute!
Nazry BiTCH!♥
Pearlyn So cute. :D
Rui Shuin Mah Couzin :D
Safwah rocks hardcore! :D ♥
Samuel ... Moo. :D ♥
Sarah BestFriend WALRUS ♥♥♥
Sheereen :DDD She cool yo!
Shi Wei :D:D:D So rad!
Si Ying, Tan rroooccckksss. :]
Si Ying, Yeh :D
Su Min She rocks!
Su Yuan :]

"Well you can hide a lot about yourself,
But honey, what're you gonna do?
And you can sleep in a coffin,
But the past ain't through with you."

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Layout: x
Image: Beyrout

I'm nothing but a beautiful disaster,
Crying tears of blood and joy
Into this black void.
Oblivion;
It's the place to be.
Ephemeral Romance.
Will you come with me?




i want to be

BEAUTIFUL

inside