MORBID mind :: The world is as ugly as it is beautiful.

Saturday, May 31, 2008

Give Me A Bloodthirst...

HOLY SHIT 100TH POST! :DDDDD

And I shall celebrate and cemorate this with a SURVEY! :D

... I'm very and bored and I'm doing my best to put off homework. Or indulge in terrible heartaching thoughts.

______________

1. Who is someone you wish you could fix things with?
C. Maybe mend everything and forget everything.

2. What does the last text message in your inbox say, and who's it from?
I forgot what it said and who it was from. Deleted all my mail.

3. What's a happy time you've had in the past week?
Meeting the sec 1 nominated councillors. Dude, they are so cute and awesome! :D

4. Is there anything in your past that you'd like to try again?
Oh yes. Two things: Reliving the moment and going to that MCR concert prepared. XD

5. Who do you like to spend your nights with?
Family. Friends. Wait... HUTTSON! :D

6. Are you an emotional person?
-emosobbz- OMG YESSS!

7. Are you self-conscious?
Very. But I keep quiet about it.

8. What's something that can always make you feel better?
HUTTSON! :D

9. Do you keep a diary?
Used to. Now this is my diary! ... Yes, I still have one.

10. Do you tend to make relationships complicated?
No, not really. But I've never had a relationship.

11. Who do you feel the most comfortable around?
The Shoethrowers Retard gang. XD

12. Favourite flavour of vitamin water?
Strawberry.

13. One thing you're looking forward to?
The 3 bloody / fun camps next week! 8D

14. How do you feel about change?
Meh, you'll get used to it. Besides, you'll live.

15. What are you not looking forward to?
Doing holiday homework. DDDDDDD:

16. What are your plans for your next birthday?
Let's hope people can remember it! :D The end.

17. Do you even care about your birthday?
Somewhat. I cheer when it's 3:16 pm, then that's it.

18. Do you think anyone out there loves you?
Other than family? No. No one would ever love me. :/

19. Do you still talk to the last person you last kissed?
Yes, I do. All the time. But Huttson never replies.

21. When is the next time you'll make out with somebody?
Probably never. I doubt I'll ever kiss / be kissed.

22. Who's the second person on your missed calls list ?
I don't know... I think it was my mom...

23. What is your favourite ringtone on your phone?
Anything My Chemical Romance. x3 <333

24. What were you doing at midnight last night?
Staring at the computer screen.

25. What is the last thing you ate?
Milo and biscuits.

26. Do you believe that everything happens for a reason?
For a sick, twisted, unknown complicated reason? Sure I do.

27. What color are the curtains of your room?
Blue, green with cartoon sheep! 8D [I'm not kidding]

28. If you could push one person off of a mountain, who would it be?
... *glares at THAT ONE I HATE SO MUCH* Self-explanatory.

29. Where did you get the shirt you're wearing?
I dunno, I got it from my mom.

30. Is anything bothering you right now?
I still need to pack... And do homework... But no, not really.

31. What's the weirdest thing you've ever heated up in a microwave?
Nothing... I've never used the microwave.

32. Are you a cuddler?
Well, I cuddle stuff, does that count?

33. Does anything hurt on your body right now?
That open wound on my foot.

34. Have you ever liked someone who treated you like crap?
Er, hell no. I ain't no Helena and I ain't no liking no Demetrius before love-juice.

35. Have you ever seen a zebra?
Yes, why the sudden question?

36. Are you offended by dumb blond jokes?
Offended? Pffa. I TELL THEM.

37. What happens tomorrow?
Dunno, we'll see.

38. If you could go back and change something, would you?
Hell yeah.

39. What does your hair look like right now?
Messy... Should get my haircut soon.

40. Has anyone disappointed you recently?
In a way, yeah... But they don't know it.

41. Will this weekend be a good one?
Hopefully. I'M IN IT RIGHT NOW.

42. How did you get the idea for your myspace name?
I don't have a myspace. And if I did, it's probably related to MCR, vampires, blood, death or twitsed, dark, obscure fantasies.

43. What is your favorite number?
3, 4, 54, 666, 1516

44. Look to your right what do you see?
SHEEPS! ... The sheep curtain.

45. Do you get attached to people easily?
Provided I've known them for a long time and grew VERY close to them.

46. Why are you online?
I don't know... O__o

47. What happened a year ago from today?
IT IS (WAS) AZIRA'S BIRTHDAY! :DDDDD

48. Have you ever been to Florida?
Nope.

49. Are you looking forward to tomorrow?
Yup. I will finally get packing.

50. If you could ask God for one thing, what would you ask for?
Make everyone happy.

51. Whats one thing thats heavily weighing on your mind?
... The fact that I remembered I had donuts! :DDD

_____________________

... Well, so much for the celebration of my 100th post.

... Donut time. o^___^o

How much longer do I have to look at you

It's making me pathetic

Weak at the knees, blushing being around you

It's making me hate myself over liking you

Leave already

Yet please don't go

You're a lovely guy, you know

Someone I adore

And someone I wish to ignore

I suppress the urge to run to you

And wipe out your memory of everything

And to also reveal my feelings

Everytime I see you

Over and over and over again

Everyday

"Am I being too cryptic? Am I being too obscure? Love kills! Romance is dead! And I don’t even trust myself, but I love you! And you can pull my wings apart, and pin me down under glass until the end of days! If it can help you discover that we share the same pain!"

- -8<- - - - WELCOME to the world of the PLASTIC BEACH - - - ->8- -

a DARK beach with a BLACK view ; it was 3:30 PM

"When the paralytic dreams that we all seem to keep. Drive on engines till they weep. With future pixels in factories far away."

Friday, May 30, 2008

Well, Honey, Ain't Love Grand?

Loads of things happened today.

Well, there's the end of remedials. And then there's SCI rehearsal. And then there was the meeting of the nominated sec 1&2 councillors.

Oh, yeah and there was the fogging of the school which looked so much alike to the zombie genocide part of 28 Weeks Later. How creepy, and terrible. The air was later so amazing inside of the hall. Barely breathed oxygen at all, I think we all were inhaling poisonous, toxic gas. What fun.

Anyway, to start. Today was the end of ALL REMEDIALS that we would have for the June holidays. Yayayayayayayyy. But still, have quite a lothomework and crap to do and finish up...

How tragic. One thing's for sure: WE CANNOT LAST-MINUTE CRAM ALL HOMEWORK AT THE LAST WEEK OF HOLIDAYS. We're Sec 3s for crying out loud... Time to put in tons of effort and energy into our academic work...

Anyway, after that, had SCI rehearsal. I must say it went pretty well. The walk-in was just... wow. We all did quiet well. No smiles, straight lines, good footing. Our Sec 3 walk-in is so glamourous... and cool. 8D Hah. Had positions drawn out on where to be for our item. We are singing! :D A Song! :D From Disney! :D And Phil Collins! :D And he's gay! :D But he's okay! :D

Well, that was odd, funny, but odd.

Finally had games day with the sec 1 nominated councillors. I must say, they seem to have potential in 'em. They just gotta be more open and outgoing. Shyness is really going to hinder them. I know, I went through it.

But something occured to me when Mrs. Rupesh was speaking to us before she let us go off playing with the Sec 1s, she talked about how we should be friendly and honest in being a councillor.

And then I realized something. In sec 1, I loathed to be a councillor. In sec 2, still unstable, but beginning to like. The Perak camp made me feel extremely comfortable in the council. And now, I guess I'm really happy now... I can really look at myself in the mirror and yell at my reflection: I love being a student councillor. Despite all the bad times and such, I still admit... I really do love this job. Besides, someone's gotta do it.

I'm lucky enough to still be doing it. o^__^o

But for now, rest and relax. Next week is EXTREME CAMP WEEK. And I've not packed at all. Not for Sec 1 camp, not for sec 3 camp... And we have no idea what to pack for Drama-sport camp... O__O

Well, isn't this nice...

Haha, my nick for the Sec 1 games day... Had everyone going WTF at my tag. XD

"And you'll be in my heart. Yes, you'll be in my heart. From this day on, now and forever more. You'll be in my heart, no matter what they say. You'll be here in my heart. Always. Always..."

- -8<- - - - WELCOME to the world of the PLASTIC BEACH - - - ->8- -

a DARK beach with a BLACK view ; it was 9:14 PM

"When the paralytic dreams that we all seem to keep. Drive on engines till they weep. With future pixels in factories far away."

Tuesday, May 27, 2008

I Am Bored And Therefore...

SURVEY TIME!

Found this from Sheereen's blog. Didn't get the instructions but I'm just gonna answer anyway...
_________________________

#1 If your lover betrayed you, what will your reaction be?
First reaction: Complete and utter shock. (like this: =OOOO)
Second reaction: Offense. Maybe anger. (like this: >=OOOO)
Third reaction: ... I dunno, we'll see from there. (like this: =/ )

#2 If you can have a dream to come true, what would it be?
Maybe one day wake up and finally be happy.

#3 Whose butt would you like to kick?
... *looks over at Nazry* >:DDDDD

#4 What would you do with a billion dollars ?
That depends, is it mine? If it is, then I save, repay debts I owe, give money to family and charity. Maybe spend a bit... But if it isn't... Return it then.

#5 What's your ideal lover like?
Well, he's tall and handsome and sexy, he's a nice, lovely guy on-or-off-stage, his name is Gerard Way and he's an amazing singer. :D♥♥♥

... Okay no, my ideal lover is a guy who's a boyfriend and best friend moulded into one. So long he's funny and compassionate, that's him.

#6 Which is more blessed, loving someone or being loved by someone?
Being loved by someone. It indeed is a very wonderful feeling to be wanted and loved.

#7 How long do you intend to wait for someone you really love?
Really love? Then as long as it takes. As long as he comes back / even if he comes back right before I die, it'll make it worth the wait.

#8 If the person you secretly like is already attached, what would you do?
Nothing. What can I do?

Go Avril Lavigne's "Girlfriend" on him and his honey? Uh. No.

#9 Is there anything that has made you extremely happy?
Oh yes, of course. And they are called FRIENDS.

#10 What takes you down the fastest?
Harsh, bitter comments that demeans.

#11 How do you see yourself in ten years time?
Honestly... I can't.

#12 Who is currently the most important people to you?
Family, Huttson, friends.

#13 What kind of person do you think the person who tagged you is?
... No one tagged me. I just did this on my own... Well, okay, SHEEREEN is a very nice and awesome person. :D

#14 Would you rather be single & rich or married but poor?
Single and rich. In marriage, I hear money can be a bad issue that leads to pain and heartbreak. I can't take any chances. O__O

#15 What's the first thing you do every morning?
Either turn off the alarm or sigh.

#16Would you give all in a relationship?
Provided it is a long-lasting, fulfilling, promising and beautiful one, then yes I will.

#17 If you fall in love with two people simultaneously, who would you pick?
GERARD WAY! :DDDD♥♥♥♥

Okay, no. Neither, because I don't want to end up making the wrong choice. It's like choosing chocolate and later you regret because you feel you want vanilla.

#18 what type of people do you hate?
The bigmouthed type who love to insult, the arrogent, overreactive type, the fuckasses who have no life but love to bother others when they're bored, the fuck-annoying ones who are ignorant of themselves and most-of-all, the assholes who think they're better than everyone else when they fail to see everyone else hates them.
__________________________

"My soul, it screams for you. Can you not hear it? My arms reach out for you, why can't you take them? My heart burns only for you, can you extinguish it? My love only to love you, why can't you love me too?"

- -8<- - - - WELCOME to the world of the PLASTIC BEACH - - - ->8- -

a DARK beach with a BLACK view ; it was 10:12 PM

"When the paralytic dreams that we all seem to keep. Drive on engines till they weep. With future pixels in factories far away."

How Am I Supposed To Feel?

... O___o

Using school computer.

Nothing much to do now, except wait for Azira until she goes off to her art remedial. This is VAIR VAIR boring.

Finished Mr. Goh's maths remedial today. It was damn-as-hell boring and talkative. Despite my constant dozes, I managed to understand modular functions and binomal theorms! Yay me. :D

...

Well not much point taking up valuable internet space by blogging about NOTHING... Oh prft. I mus needs to go does homework now.

My one-month holiday break just doesn't seem so fun-filled and FREE anymore. ...

I love-hate the Sec 3 life. This is my miserable, bittersweet romance.

"Helpless, my eyes are bleeding from the fear that's inside. You sealed your demise, when you took what was mine. Don't try and stop me from avenging this world. No voice to be heard!"

- -8<- - - - WELCOME to the world of the PLASTIC BEACH - - - ->8- -

a DARK beach with a BLACK view ; it was 12:07 PM

"When the paralytic dreams that we all seem to keep. Drive on engines till they weep. With future pixels in factories far away."

Friday, May 23, 2008

You NIGGER lover --- "OH MY!"

Ushering last night... Was boring. But somewhat fun.

Went patrolling the Sec 4 / 5 block G with Ayu. It was so freak-ass hot yesterday... But the hot weather got blown away by the cool evening breeze.

Dude... There was no rush-hour. Not much parents. Lol... We were so bored, we talked to Mr. Goh Chye Joo and Ms. Lee Ghoek Yong (sp?) ... And Ms. Lee is the most evil teacher I have ever met. Why?

Ms. Lee: Anyway, I have just one parent to go before I can go home while both of you are still here patrolling *evil snicker*
Me: ... :D... -_-''' Yeahhh. You really seem to enjoy our misery, huh? XD
Ayu: ...

Anyway, got to go for Literature Movie screening.

E D i T - 24/5/o8 12.53pm

Okay, would have updated yesterday, but I was so tired on the way back... [hitched a ride from Azira's dad with Nazry, thank you Azira & Azira's dad BTW]

So yesterday, the movie screening went pretty well. Yes, indeed. Our second official Pure Lit outing ended started with a tragic comedy because EVERYONE WAS FRIKKING LATE. Including me. The only people I would have said that were early were Nicolette, Harkiran, the 3A2 people, ASHTON (surprise, surprise) and Zhi Qing (but I made her late... Eh-heh :D''')

Nazry, Azira and Charlotte were the latest, but at least the *scape people waited for us. And by the time everyone dived into the building, the movie just started with a preview. What a new timing.

I had expected the place to be... bigger, like an auditorium, but turns out it looked more like a medium-sized room with colourful rugs and a huge screen in front of us. Despite the simplicity, the entire place seemed pretty comfortable.

The preview of the entire movie, TO KILL A MOCKINGBIRD, was completely scary... Yet funny. It went like this:

Black & White, two men glaring at each other...
Evil Farmer Man #1: "You NIGGER lover."
Nazry: "Oh my!"
Rest of the audience: "OMG!" *laughs*

The movie then began... At first I understood, because I read the first few chapters of the book, then it got complicated... But yet easier to understand.

After that movie, reading the book's gonna be easy. :D

Mm-hmm, yeah. Yeah. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Yeah. Yeah. Mm-hmm.

But overall, the show really was beautiful. Very touching, very sweet... It was great. I wanna watch it again! :D

After the whole movie thing was over, headed down to (where is that place?) across the road from the *scape youth center to eat at KFC with Nazry, Azira and Charlotte. Then started convincing Nazry to GO FOR IT before we went to the roadside to get a ride from Azira and her dad. And then we all went home...

Happy. :D

And now, to read my TKAMB book. o^___^o Weehee, this is gonna be fun!

"Pain, make your way to me, to me. And I'll always be just so inviting, if I ever start to think straight. This heart will start a riot in me. Let's start, start, hey!"

- -8<- - - - WELCOME to the world of the PLASTIC BEACH - - - ->8- -

a DARK beach with a BLACK view ; it was 3:52 PM

"When the paralytic dreams that we all seem to keep. Drive on engines till they weep. With future pixels in factories far away."

Thursday, May 22, 2008

Everybuddy, GET JEALUZZZ

Blogging using school computer now. Current timecheck: 2 PM. 3 hours and 40 minutes till Ushers meeting. 4 hours till PTM ushering. :D

Dude... This is so cool! I've never ushered in school before. At least, for this kind of events. I've ushered for other events and oragnises... But they all ended in tragedy. And chaos. And shit. And crap. And disorganziation where everyone (or maybe just me) is wondering what are we gonna/supposed to do.

Nope it's just me.

Hope this event will be fun. XD I'm "working" till 8! Yayness. =D

Anyway, today got my report book back. :D :D :D D: D: D: Oringinally I would have gotten it earlier ... But I got to my teacher too late and got my report slip moved to the end of the whole class list. I WAS the LAST to receive my report slip.

But despite that mishap, my results seemed pretty okay. Except Chinese, as predicted. 28.0 / 100 for my WHOLE MYE paper. How SADISTIC is that? The total was 35.2% ... That's still no good.

Even Mrs. Deven could tell.

!NOTE! I am gonna try my best to recall the whole convo.

Mrs. D: Your results are good, but your chinese is really bad. Are you planning to do anything about it? Are you going to get tuition from your Chinese teacher?
Me: I'm planning to get tuition.
Mrs. D: You really have to work hard for your Chinese.
Me: *nodding* Yes, okay. *leaves*

My mom is so gonna kill me. But to me and quite a lot of people I know, Chinese is a subject MEANT to be failed. GODDAMMIT! Why can't I just fail and people tell me it's hopeless to even try to understand the language and give it up? I mean, seriously, is that so damn hard?!? >:O

... Maybe I should get tuition. Or maybe shit no. Meh, I dunno.

Anyway, the RESULTS!

ENGLiSH - B4 [This... Is a RELIEF]
CHiNESE - F9 [No surprise here...]
ADD MaTHS - A1 [A pleasant surprise. :D I thought I got A2 really]
MaTHEMATiCS - A1 [Same here]
COMBiNED SCiENCE (PHYS,CHEM) - A2 [I hoped for a B3 and above. So yay!]
COMBiNED HUMaNiTiES - B3 [Not bad, considering I didn't study hard for Hist&SS]
LiTERaTURE - B4 [Damn. Got B3 for MYE, but when totaled up... Ah well. Gotta work harder.]

CLaSS POSiTiON: 2 / 42
LeVeL POSiTiON: 25 / 226
PERCENTaGE: 65.2%
L1R4 AGGREGaTE: 11
L1R5 AGGREGaTE: 15

Well, I didn't get that 70%++ as I wanted. But I have to admit, even as the stress and homework piled up and I've gotten more busier... I did pretty well. And it's safe to say I AM VERY SURPRISED AND PLEASED (well, not for Chinese) AT MY MYE RESULTS. Now... If I can only get these good grades for my EOY exams...

Anyway, for the rest (and most part) of the day, met my sec 1 group that me & Vivien (How odd, she's my ex-buddy and she's now my councillor-camp-IC buddy! :D Life is ironic and coincidencial. But yay!) And I was the 1A4 2008 batch.

... O__o I was nervous. Completely nervous. Turns out my group's okay. Had a bit of trouble getting them to INTEREACT and TALK... Thank God for Nicolette, for livening up the situation. We played Splat for icebreaker. That didn't go very well. ... Until the last few people, then things got more blur but hilarious. They wanted to call themselves Gravity... Because it pulls everyone together. Meh, I'm just glad they came up with something. XD

Note to self: Bring sweets. Get quiet, VERY quiet girl to talk. Get boys to focus. Get the other girls to unite. Get more icebreakers. xP Blahhhh.

Woo. I'm readeh for the challenge.

Timecheck: 2:34 PM. 3 hours and 6 mins till Council Ushers Meeting. Too-lazy-to-calculate-how-much-longer-till-PTM hours & minutes.

"I gave you blood, blood, gallons of the stuff, I gave you all that you can drink and it has never been enough. I gave you blood, blood, blood... I'm the kind of human wreckage that you love!"

- -8<- - - - WELCOME to the world of the PLASTIC BEACH - - - ->8- -

a DARK beach with a BLACK view ; it was 1:57 PM

"When the paralytic dreams that we all seem to keep. Drive on engines till they weep. With future pixels in factories far away."

Thursday, May 15, 2008

Too Little Too Late

Firstly, I wanna say:

CONGRADULATIONS TO THE NEW 2008 / 2009 EXCOs!

Make this the best "generation" ever yet, guys. :D

And next... My results. Wooo. It's safe to say I did pretty well. Pretty okay, quite well, considering how "serious" I took this exam. Though I know I should be stepping up on my game and studying harder. The second half of the year seems more hectic, with Council stuff, CCA... Plus academic...

It really makes me wonder, how do people do it? Them not being so serious and capable (like me) but yet able to achieve something so great. It really makes me wonder would I be able to do something like that?

I wanted that vet course... But no poly seems to offer it, and I don't feel like heading to JC... I might have to turn to Mass Comm. but then again...

My future seems so bleak. And unstable.

It's odd. It's not even June, and I feel as though I'm leaving school already, leaving something important and dear behind. Like something's ripped out of me.

And now I find myself reminiscing about the past. I'm crying over the loss of all the opportunities I had. All the mistakes I made. Someone talking to me triggered a memory I personally buried, and even now I'm still making the same mistake. Even now I'm still pushing away opportunities. These things might never come again and I only realize that now. Why can't I see that during the times where the opportunity rises? Why must I only, after rejecting it, realize and wish, pray, hope, pine and whine for it to come back?

Now the loss seems so deep. And my life is going so fast, I barely even notice. Wasn't yesterday the day I started Sec 2? And loved every moment of it? How come today I'm ready for the June Holidays and preparing for my O Level's next year?

And now... And now... I think I'm going through hell. Or some depressed emo realization life reflecting thing...

"A rush of blood, to my head, leaves me winded and wanting to feel the weakness, in my body, beaten and crushed like my soul."

- -8<- - - - WELCOME to the world of the PLASTIC BEACH - - - ->8- -

a DARK beach with a BLACK view ; it was 6:59 PM

"When the paralytic dreams that we all seem to keep. Drive on engines till they weep. With future pixels in factories far away."

Friday, May 9, 2008

All So Odd Men

Okay, guys. I'm sure you already 10000% know but just to finally get it done and over with:

MYEs ARE FRIGGING OVER!!!

Life is good now... Even today's Literature today didn't seem too bad. Question 1a was a total disappointment to myself though.

Anyway, after the teacher dismissed us, everyone was so hyped up they started screaming. I joined in the "festivites" and screamed along as well. GOD! Before sec 3, after MYEs and EOYs, my class have never screamed out loud in delight, but hey... I guess welcome to 3A1.

And now to wait and see if our results match our studying. I have a high probability of failing though. Oh well, who doesn't?

Anyway, after the last paper, Charlotte, Azira, Sarah and me headed down to Orchard Road to go buy books and Charlotte's wallet. We got there pretty late [Thank you Charlotte], like 12-ish, and while walking up the slope to Takashimaya (sp?), we started playing around with Azira's camera. We did weird poses and such... As well as getting shot while leaping in midair. It was so fun... And cute as well.

I think the employees outside of the building were wondering WTFH we were doing. Haha, we then went to Kinokuniya and Charlotte and I got attracted to the Manga section. I can still feel Azira and Sarah literally dragging us away from the comics... Bought VK vol. 6 and Hellsing [non-Chuang Yi] vol. 6 and man... Did it cost a bomb on me. O___o Would you believe $20+ for one manga? I can't either. BUT IT WAS FREAKING WORTH IT!

After we finished, we went downstairs when we came across a art gallery. I thought it required a fee, but turns out it was free-viewing to the public. We then checked it out and awed over the intense DETAIL of the artwork... All paint, no prints. But those very high-classed art gallery people glowered at us and went all "DON'T TOUCH".

WE'RE NOT TOUCHING. We're just looking at it VERY CLOSELY. Bahhh. We got out of there because it seemed so cold and unfriendly... And also it got boring. And besides, some artwork there was seriously creepy. We saw from a distance a lady in a nice dress but when we made closer, the dress disappeared and we saw a nude body. ILLUSIONS PEOPLE. But it was way weird and way funny.

After that episode, we went down to the "Affordable stuff area" [the basement] and ate at KFC. Two odd stuff happened. While we were buying our food, some Ang Mor came and very heartily (and loudly) asked one of the cashiers: "DO YOU ACCEPT CREDIT CARDS?"

... O__o ... o__- ... x__o Yeah, I know. Whut?

When they replied they didn't, they gave him directions to go to the ATM to go get cash. And I saw his outfit. Seriously, what is up with men who like to show off their CHEST hair? I mean, this guy's chest was so full of hair and he was wearing a button-up long-sleeved shirt and made it looked V-necked... God knows how much hair he has scarred us with.

The second odd stuff that happened was that while eating, we noticed a very tall, dark and... average-looking guy. It's not that he was cute or anything. BUT WE FOCUSED ON HIM LIKE SHIT. Why? Because he was dressed in white shoes [like those female shoes with low heels], had a female-looking handbag and was wearing pinstripe purple bermudas and button-up shirt. The equation? One very gay manwhore.

Heck, even the way he stood and carried the manpurse made us cry and laugh. What is happening in the world?

But then after that we headed down to the Heren to buy Charlotte's wallet. But Azira had to leave early. I wish she hadn't, caused she missed something else VERY VERY odd. Again. We checked out HMV first, where I was looking at T-shirts [MCR, yes] when I noticed this guy was wearing headphones and listening to the samples of some CDs. He just started dancing.

Like literally. Dancing. Headcore dancing, headbanging. He was just so caught up in his crazy antics, he started screaming [the rocker kinda scream] to the lyrics. That cracked us up. When he left I decided to try it, and I know why he's so happy.

I innocently played the first CD [Taking Back Sunday] and when the first track started, it killed my ears. THE FRIGGING VOLUME ON THE SAMPLER WAS ON FULL-FUCKING-BLAST. My god, no wonder that man seemed so happy and unable to hear our sniggers.

What a guy.

In the end, I didn't get my MCR shirt that I wanted... it was $34+... Maybe another time. And Charlotte didn't get her wallet. The wallet shop had moved. D:

We headed back to the MRT, but we had time before Sarah had to leave, so off to Borders we went. We found a dirt adult joke book, but we didn't get it, so we moved onto a astrology book. I gave up finding Moon & sun of Aries and went inside the bookstore.

I finally got my A Thousand Splendid Suns and it was $18.15. Seems worth it. :D And besides, it's the same shape as my TKAMB book, small and paperback. Now that exams are over, MORE FREE TIME.

Then we all split up and went home. But on Monday thou shalt all party again because thou art going to thee airport! And then to thou Esplanade. And then to thou Suntec City, where Michelle shalt finally hath her pretzel that thine wanted but could not get. ... Don't ask, I didn't get my waffle or my pretzel today.

It was so sad. DDDDDD`:

But anyway... What a good day. I LOVE AFTER-EXAM ACTIVITIES!

"The bullets tear around me, bodies falling, voices calling for me, limbs are flying, men are crying, such a hurtful sight, the call is made, it's one for all. TAKE NO PRISONERS!"

- -8<- - - - WELCOME to the world of the PLASTIC BEACH - - - ->8- -

a DARK beach with a BLACK view ; it was 8:52 PM

"When the paralytic dreams that we all seem to keep. Drive on engines till they weep. With future pixels in factories far away."

Monday, May 5, 2008

The Exam Numbers Are Getting Low, Low, Low, Low, Low...

Hey guys.

Chemistry is over.

To me, it seems relatively easy. Very do-able on a scale of 10, I'd give it a 9.

Mr. Goh CJ made things so easy for us to score... Heck there was even a damn crossword puzzle! :D Mr. Goh, if I pass... I love-ve-ve yooouuuu... :`D -sobs emotionally- But if I don't, oh well, I still love Mr. G's lessons. :D

Well, anyway, it's just three subjects more and four exams. :D Ain't that great? It'll go so fast we barely even notice. Today's 1 hr 45 min paper seems non-existant right now...

I should go sleep before I go study E Maths and History...

All the best, you guys. Jia You! :D

The exam numbers are getting:
L o w, L o w, L o w, L o w, L o w, L o w, L o w ...

E D i T

Ooh, E Maths Paper 1 is over. And it went pretty okay, had a few hiccups here and there, but generally I feel good about it. Provided I didn't make thousands of careless mistakes that will affect my marks. The 2 hours seem so insignificant. O__o

History now. The 1 hour paper will be fast and nerve-wrecking. Gahh. Got to scribble loads of stuff fast. Whoa, okay. Had my Hist MYE, and mannnn, it was okay. I think I can scare for this paper compared to SS. ... Yay...

HOLY SHIT ONE11111!!!1one!!!11 MOAR PAPERZ.

Now to be careful NOT CARELESS in E Maths Paper 2. o^___^o
OMG SHIT. E Maths Paper 2 was fuck hard... And the MYE papers last year wasn't hard at all! WHAT HAPPENED NOW?!

God. My A Maths has no hope... E Maths now? Good lord... It's like some never ending torture zone.

And now, LITERATURE! Wooo, at least, this subject we all are aiming high. :D And WE WILL ACHIEVE!

[ Plus, Nazry & Elva & Charlotte & a bit of Sarah came to my place to study... It turned into Hell when we didn't study at all but instead lazed around and talked a lot about random stuff... Everything seems so fun now! xD You guys, we got to have this talk more often! ]

Literature... BAHHH!!! The essay question is so blown over. WHY THE FREAK DID I NOT DO 1(b)?!?! I FREAKING KNOW MY STUFF IN PART B! But noooo, I had to do AAaaaaaa. Sigh. But anyway, no more use whining over this...

~~E MATHS PAPER 1~~
~~HISTORY~~
~~E MATHS PAPER 2~~
~~LITERATURE~~

S a L V A T i O N !

"She got her nails did, she got her hair did. She got a Gucci bag, her brand new outfit. Stuck on my elevator, she on the second floor. Now I want you to break it down, DJ turn it up some more."

- -8<- - - - WELCOME to the world of the PLASTIC BEACH - - - ->8- -

a DARK beach with a BLACK view ; it was 11:56 AM

"When the paralytic dreams that we all seem to keep. Drive on engines till they weep. With future pixels in factories far away."

Saturday, May 3, 2008

To Me Or Her, Whatever.

Today was a pretty bad day.

Mom and brother quarreled a lot.

Heck, I even told my dog: "Huttson, this is a perfect example of a dysfunctional family. You're in it."

I just don't care anymore.

I used to care a lot. Now I'm casting aside my exams...

I used to care. I wonder what happened.

And just so you know, I gave up caring about/for you. I liked you as my friend, I really did. I harbour no secret feelings of detest or loathing for you. I NEVER DID. I actually enjoyed having you as my friend for the years. But congradulations, you seem pretty happier without any of us. And truth be told, I think we're happier without you.

At least, I am. Maybe I will be.

I cared about the situation. I wanted the both of you to make up. But now, that seems impossible isn't it? To think, 2 years of friendship and strong bonds could be broken off just like THAT. Maybe I'm being unreasonable, maybe I'm just being too proud and seeing things my way that, maybe I should just step off, back down and pretend I never part of all this.

Maybe I should stop caring.

Because you stopped.

Because she stopped.

Because I used to think I was lucky to be your friend. I ENVIED YOU. I ENVIED HER. I ENVIED THE BOTH OF YOU. Why? Because I saw you as great people I guess.

But now, I give up. I'm following advice to try to talk to you... But now there's a barrier set. So I'm officially not your friend anymore huh? That's okay, I guess. I never thought myself to be your friend really. And I got two people to testify you said that.

I cared.

Now, I still do actually.

But just not now. Maybe I'll worry for you if anything happens to you [NOT CURSING YOU HERE], maybe I'll wonder what you're thinking or how you feel... But I don't think I can care.

Why?

Because after all that happened, I FUCKING GIVE UP CARING ABOUT AND FOR YOU. You're confident and strong enough to fend for yourself, unlike me. So enjoy your life without us, you might find it better for yourself. We already are.

But don't bother swearing and cursing me behind my back, talking bad about me to other people, sneering at me, don't bother, because frankly I don't care, in fact, I see it as a source of amusement, hearing what pathetic things you say about me just humours me.

Thanks a lot. You make me smile.

Fie, fie you conterfeit you.

Whether we ever do make up and become friends again, that remains to be seen. But just stop crying out loud and complaining in pain and agony already. It's emotionally weak for people like you.

E D i T

5 moar papers to go! Must do well for Chem, History, E Maths P1&2 and Literature to save my ass... A Maths & SS & Physics are total gone-cases.

"You better run like the devil, 'cause they're never gonna leave you alone! You better hide up in the alley, 'cause they're never gonna find you a home! And as the blood runs down the walls, you see me creepin' up these halls. I've been a bad motherfucker, tell your sister I'm another."

- -8<- - - - WELCOME to the world of the PLASTIC BEACH - - - ->8- -

a DARK beach with a BLACK view ; it was 10:14 PM

"When the paralytic dreams that we all seem to keep. Drive on engines till they weep. With future pixels in factories far away."

Friday, May 2, 2008

A Maths is and is HISTORY

A Maths... A frikkin' disappointment.

I knew most of the questions, my methods seemed ok.

But lo and behold... Question 9b onwards, it was a spiralling downfall. I guess I can have no more chance at that A1 I wanted so badly.

The answers were so weird... Decimal places when I think a whole number would have been present was what I got...

I think I can go shoot myself now.

Wait till the results come out... I'm in for a torture parade...

"And say goodbye to the last parade, and walk away from the choice you've made, and say goodnight to the hearts you break, and all the cyanide that you've drank."

- -8<- - - - WELCOME to the world of the PLASTIC BEACH - - - ->8- -

a DARK beach with a BLACK view ; it was 1:07 PM

"When the paralytic dreams that we all seem to keep. Drive on engines till they weep. With future pixels in factories far away."